Note: Because of a combination of holiday travel, an all night Thursday birthday party for Matthew J Caplicki, and various family commitments, Today’s Reads has not posted in a few days. Also, I am up in New England and this computer is not able to post links properly.
1. “He loved that whole Kipling scene”: Charlie Wilson in real life and on screen
Go see Charlie Wilson’s War, ASAP. Why? Because a) it’s a wonderful film b) it explains how 9/11 came to be and c) it could directly benefit this author.
So far, every post-9/11 war related movie (Lions For Lambs, Rendition, Jarhead, Redacted) or television show (Over There) has been overly somber and Gyllenhally. War is depressing, for sure, but combatants and civilians use humor to get through it. With Wilson’s War, Tom Hanks, director Mike Nichols (The Graduate), and screenwriter Aaron Sorkin (West Wing, Studio 60) have found a true-life, funny as hell war story—involving a “skirt chasing congressman” who financed the Jihad in 80s Afghanistan that later morphed into the Taliban and al Qaeda. I just saw it and laughed my ass off every time Philip Seymor Hoffman popped onscreen as a deadpan CIA hack.
Now, this author co-wrote a book, Babylon By Bus, set in Iraq, about being skirt-denied and (accidentally) funding Moqtada al Sadr’s Shiite militia with humanitarian aid. Like Wilson’s War, it’s a dark comedy set in war. Optioned by NBC Universal in 2005, Babylon’s been stuck in development because “Nobody’s ready to laugh about war yet.” So, if Wilson’s War is a hit, then maybe Babylon will get made. (Bad news: Wilson opened poorly at $9 million; Nic Cage’s faggotty National Treasures 2 did 45 million!)
Anyway, Saturday’s WaPost ran a long take-out on the real Charlie Wilson, who was a Democratic congressman from Texas. It reminded me why the Post, when given the right material, is about the best paper in the world. Every single line of the story made me smirk, but here’s some highlights, starting with the lede (Wilson’s still alive today, BTW):
“Charlie did not drink in the office,” said Elaine Lang Cornett. “At least not until the end of the day.”
“He did drink a good bit, though,” said Carol Simons Huddleston. “Hence the heart transplant.”
“I think they over-exaggerated his drug use — but don’t quote me on that,” said another of Charlie’s Angels.
Charlie’s Angels were the women who worked in Wilson’s office during his gloriously colorful 24-year career in Congress, and they were famous on Capitol Hill for their pulchritude and general foxiness.
He was married when he arrived in Congress, but that didn’t last long. The ’70s was the age of disco, and Wilson became part-owner of a flashy K Street dance club called Elan, which was not known as a hotbed of monogamy. “He had a love of whiskey and a love of the ladies,” says his friend Larry L. King, author of “The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.”
“He used to drive us crazy because he was such a chauvinist, but he also gave us so many opportunities. For heaven’s sakes, I was a woman on Defense Appropriations, where there weren’t very many of us.”
In the summer of 1980, Wilson traveled to Las Vegas with a girlfriend, who happened to be a Playboy cover girl, and he somehow ended up in a hot tub at Caesars Palace with two naked showgirls.
“The girls had cocaine, and the music was loud,” Wilson told the late George Crile, author of the 2003 book
“Charlie Wilson’s War,” which inspired the movie. “It was total happiness. And both of them had 10 long, red fingernails with an endless supply of beautiful white powder. . . . The feds spent a million bucks trying to figure out whether, when those fingernails passed under my nose, did I inhale or exhale, and I ain’t telling.”
Those “feds” were led by Rudolph Giuliani, then a young Justice Department attorney, heading an investigation into drug use on Capitol Hill. When news of the probe leaked, Wilson denied that he’d used cocaine. Then he added a promise that was pure Wilson: “I won’t blame booze and I won’t suddenly find Jesus.”
“He loved that whole Kipling scene,” says Bearden, laughing.
Using all his skills at backroom politics, Wilson maneuvered to get funding for the Afghan rebels — overt funding for humanitarian aid and covert funding for weapons. “It’s the only place in the world where we are killing Russians,” he said in the early 1980s. “I don’t know anybody who wants to be against backing religious freedom fighters against the atheistic horde from the north.”
Wilson made more than a dozen trips to Afghan refugee camps in Pakistan, where he was deeply moved by the courage and tenacity of the Afghans. Being Charlie, he also managed to have some fun. On one trip, he brought along his girlfriend, Annelise Ilschenko, a former Miss World USA. On another trip, he strapped on a gun, saddled up a horse and rode into Afghanistan with a group of rebels.
2. Boston Paradise Sold to Live Nation
In the 90s I saw Pulp, Spiritualized, Coldplay and many lesser Britpop greats at the Paradise, a 600 capacity club near Boston University. But the Paradise was far too pretty a club for Boston, a city with a love for fratty pubs, degenerate dives, and cheesy discos. This week Live Nation, the largest concert promoter in the world, purchased the Dise from the Lyons’ Group. New York’s seen a lot of this mid-size venue gobbling recently—Blender Theater, Filmore East at Irving P, Nokia Theater. Seems to be a national trend. I’d say the Dise being purchased by a conglomerate is a bad thing, but in Boston, where local bookings sucks ass, this likely means better touring acts will come through.
The concert industry is incredibly robust, topping out a $4 billion in revenue this year, growing from a mere billion dollars in 1999. Over that same time period, the record industry has lost $3 billion. It seems safe to say music as a whole hasn’t lost that much from “digital revolution.” In fact, touring revenue goes to musicians at a higher percentage than CD proceeds: usually a band gets 50-80% of the door at a Paradise-type show, whereas it would get $2 bucks from a $15 CD. So downloading’s aftershocks most affect corporate record labels. (Also, rappers, who don’t have much of a touring market.)
Through myspaces and pitchforks, the net has allowed more mid-size bands to flourish. Hence the mid-size venue absorption by Live Nation and the like. But for every Live Nation, there’s an indie like Bowery Presents, who’ve gone from booking two venues to six-plus in the last 5 years. Or how about Ellis Industries’ Matt Galle, who’s gone from doing Legion Hall shows to Madsion Square Garden concerts in six years without expanding beyond the post-hardcore-emo spectrum.
Overall, there’s never been a better time in American history to see live music. Want proof? Check the Village Voice’s music section, which are the only newspaper pages to thicken in the last five years.
3. AP’s Top Ten Stories 2007
1. VIRGINIA TECH KILLINGS:
2. MORTGAGE CRISIS
3. IRAQ WAR
4. OIL PRICES:
5. CHINESE EXPORTS
6. GLOBAL WARMING
7. BRIDGE COLLAPSE
8. PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN.
9. IMMIGRATION DEBATE
10. IRAN’S NUCLEAR PROGRAM
I can’t believe Iraq’s not number 1. More troops died there this year than in any year of the war, not to mention the Surge’s success. VT killer’s a big deal, don’t get me wrong, but ten times as many kids aged 14-28 have died from gun violence in New Orleans this year. And in New Orleans the violence is related to socio-economics, not one cuckoid who somehow was sold tools of war despite being mentally boondoggled. Also, Pakistan’s state of emergency, Burma’s crackdown, Russia’s consolidation of power, Somalia, Taliban’s resurgence and a host of other international crisis would seem more important than a bridge collapsing.
4. London Capital of World?
Luckily for urbanites everywhere, The Independent newspaper has carried out a global survey of cities and conveniently found London, the city where the paper is published, to be the capital of the world. Let’s explore The Independent’s methodology. I assume they used Robert Fisk, The Independent’s legendary (anti-Zionist, quasi-liar, total perv) Middle East correspondent, to carry out an Islamic terror assessment.
“With one of the world’s most ebullient stock exchanges, a bustling and economically attractive City, the highest number of Unesco World Heritage Sites in any city, and a truly international restaurant scene that typifies its cultural make-up with more ethnic restaurants than any other metropolis, London scores highly across the board.”
Buried in the story is London’s besting of New York by a mere two points. Call me crazy, but New York’s the center of America, the world’s sole superpower. As opposed to Britain, a nation that can’t even figure out how to modestly assimilate its 2 million muslims. Plus, In three hours one can walk from Chelsea to Flatiron, Grammercy, East Village, West Village, Soho, Tribeca, and the LES. All those neighborhoods are connected, taking up maybe ten square miles. There’s only a handful of London neighborhoods that compare to any of the above, and they’re not all woven quilt-like. I’ll take New York any day.
5. What We Talk About When We Talk About the Surge.
The Times and the WaPost both have run Iraq cover stories in their Sunday editions, on the Surge’s arming of Sunnis and Iran’s draw-down respectively.
When the Surge began, Baghdad had been almost fully ethnically cleansed—Shiites took over the east and north of the Tigris, as Sunnis were stuffed south and west. The Surge stabilized the cleansed city by partitioning it with blast walls and checkpoints, then arming and paying Sunni militias to guard these mini-fiefs.
The Times checks in with a handful of Baghdad’s Sunni neighborhood militias, called Awakening Councils. Reading the piece leads me to believe that arming Sunni nationalists is a questionable tactic at best. The Shiite-led government has taken few steps to incorporate the Awakening Councils into the army or police forces. In fact, the gov’t’s announced it will not do so. And the story’s littered with quotes from both Sunni and Shia saying the US is sowing the seeds of civil war by arming both sides before reconciliation. Nonetheless, violence is down to pre-April 2004 levels. With security improved, the window is open for national reconciliation and hope—a concept foreign to Iraq for nearly four years—flickers anew.
The biggest non-reported issue of the Surge involves Baghdad’s Sadr City, home to 2 million Shiites, and the power base of uber-thug cleric Moqtada Sadr and his Mahdi Militia. It hasn’t been reported on because, well, American troops have yet to Surge into Sadr City. Of the many reasons why the US has avoided entering Sadr City, the most prominent is that its 2 million poor are crammed into 8 square miles, making it a radical Shia black hole. Another reason the US hasn’t gone in is Moqtada himself. Five months ago he called a cease-fire. From that day on US casualties dropped. Why? Because, despite what Bush, Gates, and Petreaus would like us to believe, the number one killer of US troops is not al Qaeda in Iraq but Shiite militants backed by Iran.
The Wa Post story offers background on the Sadr cease-fire and Iran’s hand in it:
Several officials said the change began with the attack in late August on two of Shiite Islam’s holiest shrines. More than 50 people were killed and hundreds were wounded when members of the Jaish al-Mahdi (JAM) militia, also called the Mahdi Army, of radical Shiite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr fired rocket-propelled grenades and rifles into a crowd of thousands of religious pilgrims. The violence apparently was the result of clashes between Sadr’s militia and the Badr Organization, the armed wing of Iraq’s largest Shiite political party, the Supreme Islamic Iraqi Council.
The killing sparked widespread public outrage and deeply embarrassed the Shiite-dominated government of Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki. Sadr subsequently suspended JAM violence, although breakaway militia factions — called “special groups” by the U.S. military — have continued to attack U.S. and Iraqi government forces.
Their weapon of choice, roadside bombs, particularly the explosively formed projectiles the United States has said are provided by Iran, has been responsible for more U.S. casualties in Iraq than any other form of attack.
“Iran is an enormously complex government, society and country, and we’re not there,” Crocker said in a telephone interview from Baghdad. “I am real modest about what I think I understand on Iranian actions, decisions and motivations. That said, given Iranian influence, particularly within the Sadr movement and JAM,” the freeze on JAM operations that began four months ago would not exist without Iranian approval, he said.
When do we just admit we’re at war with Iran? To paraphrase a scene in Charlie Wilson’s War, once the bullets become our bullets then we go from a covert war to a real war. Doesn’t the above seem to imply the Iranians and Mahdi are one in the same but using Iranian bullets?
Taken together, the Times and Post stories paint the Surge as a moment of calm before a new storm. The Sunni militias we’re arming are a lot like the Mahdi Militia. Both are neighborhood thugs with guns. If Sadr expires his truce, not only will US troops start dying again, they may have to enter Sadr City. America’s never really attempted to pacify Sadr City. In 2004 the US fought battles and led incursions there but nothing of large scale, Surge style. If Sadr City explodes, the Mahdi and Sunnis could easily face off in unprecedented violence. Mind you the Mahdi were responsible for much of the post-Feb 2006 ethnic cleansing—the WaPost reported that during the weekend after the shrine was bombed, Mahdi killed over 1000 Sunni.
To avoid further bloodletteing, Moqtada Sadr must keep his cease-fire alive long enough for some reconciliation, at least until the Awakening Councils are incorporated into the gov’t.
6. China and Darfur, the US and Ethiopia/Somailis
How many times do you read about the Chinese propping up a corrupt Bashir in Sudan, and how it leads to ethnic slaughter in Darfur? Guess what? The Chinese probably aren’t going to stop needing Sudan’s oil. Maybe as the Olympics approach China will bend slightly. The pressure needs to keep up, of course, but some frustrated Darfur-watchers could place their energy closer to home.
America has propped up Ethiopia’s dictatorship with $500 million dollars in military aid this year alone. That’s the same amount we gave the Mujihadeen in Afghanistan in 1988. The US’ money is being used by the Ethiopian army to occupy Somalia, which is now in a Drafur-like condition of chaotic ethnic warfare. 1 million have fled Mogadishu alone.
Funny enough, The Islamic government the Ethiopians displaced had offered Somalia its first peace in 15 years. Unlike the Pashtun Taliban, Somalis do not have an ethnic code requiring them to host all guests, even al Qaeda. America backed regime change in Somalia without even attempting to engage the Islamists in Somalia. Now thousands have died and Somalia’s again in the top five worst humanitarian crises on earth.
Meanwhile, some of the US’ money is going to Ethiopia’s scorched earth war in the breakaway Ogden Province, where ethnic-Somalis are being raped and slaughtered c/o US tax money. As we all know, killing civilians does not stop terrorism—it creates terrorists.
Stopping the war in Darfur takes changing the minds of a Chinese government that keeps its own 1.5 billion people out of its governing decisions. Stopping the wars in Ethiopia and Somalia would take Americans withholding their half-billion in tax money. Maybe we could use that money to rebuild New Orleans…or some bridges? Let’s tell Obama or Hilary we want Ethiopia to become a campaign issue now!
7. Small Dickistan
Recently some economist studied a few thousand strippers and found they make 100% more when they don’t have their periods. I propose a similar study on guns and penis size. My belief is that those with small peckers are 100% more likely to buy guns. Small dick syndrome is the number one cause of mustache related injury in this country. We should fence off west Texas and let all the small dick, big gun folk have their own country called Small Dickistan.
8. Haiti Drug Jump Off
The LA Times reports—with some amazing pictures of airplane to boat drug drops–that 10% of the drugs in America pass through Haiti. Hmmm….a few years ago I was in Haiti, and one night we went to a whorehouse in Port au Prince’s Bel Air neighborhood (the nicest hood in the country) and was sold only fake drugs.
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